Important Lessons in Science

Work today was interesting.

I was had to end and set up a new run mostly on my own. This didn't go very well. There are a lot of steps to remember, and I've only seen it done twice and never done it fully by myself before, so I forgot a bunch of things. Also, I did a bunch of things wrong, which brings us to Important Science Lesson Number One.

Lesson Number One: When trying to see something up close, bring your face to the object, not the object to your face.

Why? Well, when you bring the object to your face, it is now over your lap or the ground, instead of the nice, brightly colored table. This means that when you drop said object or parts of said object or things that may be not so solidly glued to said object, they fall onto the floor, which brings us to Important Science Lesson Number Two.

Important Science Lesson Number Two: Don't drop carbon objects onto carbon colored rugs.

The rug where I work varies in color from dark grey to light grey. Carbon, whether graphite or diamond, varies from black, to dark grey, to a shiny grey. Thus, finding on this rug tiny pieces of carbon, like a piece of pencil graphite or in this case, four square millimeters of diamond, is extremely difficult. I have spent no small amount of time on my hands and knees today and on past days.

Now, after all this trouble, you've got everything set up. You put it all together, the machine starts running, it's time for you to twist some knob to move things into place. This is where Important Science Lesson Number Three comes into play.

Important Science Lesson Number Three: Know which direction is the correct direction to twist the knobs on scientific instruments.

So, after that run is aborted, we go through the whole process again, all the steps in all the right order and, oops! Forgot to unplug the fragile 800 dollar cable!

Important Science Lesson Number Four: Don't break expensive machinery.

Fortunately, nothing was broken. My boss did spend half an hour rearranging things though, such that there's much less chance of said fragile 800 dollar cable breaking. Close one.

So, why all of these mistakes? Why today? Well, a good amount of it can probably be attributed to my not listening to Important Science Lesson Number Five:

Important Science Lesson Number Five: Don't do science while extremely hungry. Your constant thoughts about when you're going to get to eat are distracting, and the general hunger corrodes your attentiveness and thought.

So what's the result of this? Tomorrow, I'm packing lunch!